Grief is ugly. It’s truly unattractive in every way. There’s nothing pretty or soft about it. Grief is primal, raw, and relentless; and it’ll kick you in the balls when you least expect it, creating disconnection, feelings of abandonment and isolation in a very crude way; coz grief is kind of an asshole like that.
We are all grieving something whether it’s a relationship, lost time, a regret, trauma, a loved one, my pre-baby body (true story) or even a business that didn’t quite go to plan.
Life is so confusing. I don’t mean in a ‘searching for your true spiritual purpose’ kinda way. But like everyday! Life is confusing; I am confused – a lot.
There’s this life I want, you know, where I meditate every day, am happy to have really given up the fags, I love to exercise, eat clean whole foods because my body is a temple and I am a walking goddess! In this life there is no clutter, in my house or my mind. I menu plan and know where everything is in my home before anyone has even asked. It’s the life where I am all over everything, you know, school readers, and camp notes, I’m organized and dare I say it; happy and pretty proud of myself. It’s the life where I am practicing the self-love I so keenly share with my clients and walk my talk. This is the life where I am a social butterfly, with a little bit of Earth Mother, Mother Theresa and the Dali Lama thrown in, saving the world, one confused, lonely, troubled soul at a time, leaving nothing but a trail of inspiration in my wake.
Here’s the thing though, sometimes my life, for a fleeting moment, is exactly like this and other times it really, really isn’t.
I am a bit of a hippy, a lot of a foodie and a lover of all things beautiful :-)